Happy Birthday: Alas-Ramus
by countrypanther14
Summary: When Ashiya accidentally cancels the reservations for Alas-Ramus' birthday party, Urushihara tries to have the party at the apartment. What will happen? I own nothing but any OCs. Rated just to be safe. R&R.
1. Chapter 1

**I was bored. So R &R.**

* * *

"How could this have happened?" Ashiya mumbled as he paced back and forth. "We're sure to lose the apartment if we don't pay the rent soon..."

"What is Good Shiro mumbling about?" Suzuno whispered to Urushihara as she finished hanging the laundry.

"Our land lord raised our rent. And we're short by almost $400." he answered. "And for once, I'm not the one causing the problem."

"But why so much?" she asked.

"I don't know," he said, shrugging his shoulders. "But, since I'm on the computer. I'll just check." He opened a blank tab on the computer and hacked into Maou's bank account; tracing a deposit to a child's play area. "Oh right, the reservations." he said.

"What reservations?" Ashiya asked, hearing him.

"The reservations to "Cheezy Chipmunk's Playhouse"." he said.

"What? Why would we ever make reservations there?"

"Probably because-"

"I better call and cancel." Ashiya said.

"Um, Ashiya. I don't think that's a good-"

"Not now, Lucifer." he said

"Good Shiro, I think you should-"

"Not now, Ms. Kamazuki. It's ringing.

"Ashiya, hang up the-"

"Hi, my name is Sadao Maou. I would like to cancel the reservations I made for next Saturday." Ashiya said. "Mmhmm...uh-huh...Okay, thank you." He hung up the phone, only to get another call. "Hello?"

"Yeah, this is your conscience calling." Urushihara said. "I'm calling to tell you that Maou will murder you when he finds out that you canceled the reservations for Alas=Ramus' birthday party."

"What?!" Ashiya yelled, turning to the purple haired fallen angel and hanging up the phone. "Why didn't you stop me?!"

"We tried, you wouldn't listen." Suzuno said.

"Yeah, and you can't un-cancel the reservations. So now, you're fucked."

"Lucifer." Suzuno snapped.

"Hey, be happy I didn't tell him that the place doesn't give refunds." he whispered. "Besides, that is the only word I could think of for this situation."

"We're home." Maou said as he carried Alas=Ramus in on one arm. "And Ashiya, do you mind watching Alas=Ramus for a few hours, I need to go to work."

"Yes your majesty." Ashiya said as he took the child into his arms.

"I wanna watch cartoons." Alas=Ramus said, struggling to get out of Ashiya's arms.

"What? But we don't have any channels suitable for-"

"Here you go kid." Urushihara said, pulling up a video.

Getting out of Ashiya's grip, Alas=Ramus ran to the computer and put in the earphones that Urushihara would use, clicking the play button as cartoon characters danced across the screen.

"What?" he asked, catching the look in Maou's eyes. "Look, I know I can be irresponsible at times, but I'm not that irresponsible. You need to put a little more faith in me."

"Whatever," Maou said as he walked out the door. "I'll see you guys when I get home."

As soon as they knew he was gone, Suzuno glared at him.

"Good Hanzo, why didn't you tell him about the reservations?" she said.

"Because, A:) they don't give refunds; B:) Ashiya would blame it on me, seeing as how that was something I would have done. And C:) Even if Ashiya took responsibility for canceling the party, I would still be thrown out because Maou would not believe him."

"What?" Alas=Ramus said, turning away from the cartoon.

"It's nothing sweety." Ashiya said.

"But I heard no party." she said, looking to Urushihara. "Why isn't there a party Uncle Luci?" she asked, her eye filling with tears. "Why?"

 _Why does this make me so weak?_ he thought as the tears started rolling down her face. "Well, because...umm..." He heard a sniffle and saw that she was about to start crying. "Y-Your daddy couldn't come up with the money to pay for "Cheezy Chipmunk's Playhouse." he said. "But that's okay...we could have the party here."

"Really?" she asked, her eyes lighting up.

"Yes," he said. "But we'll talk about that later, for now, just watch some cartoons; Ashiya will make you some lunch."

"Okay," she said, turning back to the episode of "Hamtaro" she was watching.

Sighing in relief that Alas didn't break down crying because the party was cancelled, he looked to Ashiya and Suzuno, who were glaring at him. "Yes guys, I am aware that I just dug myself into a deep hole." he said.

"More like your grave." Suzuno said, "And you do realize that I'm not going to help you. Neither is Ashiya."

"Why not?"

"Because, this is your doing." she said. "You have to bail yourself out."

"Please," Ashiya scoffed. "I don't think he'd be able to do it. A room full of screaming children, making a mess with who knows what."

"Alright," Urushihara said. "That sounds reasonable."

"What?" they both asked.

"I'll make you guys a bet." he said. "If I can entertain the entire party of two and three year olds, you have to treat me with respect; and Ashiya has to admit to Maou that he was the one that cancelled the party."

"And if you can't?" Suzuno asked.

"I'll do the chores in both our apartments for a week." he said.

"You're on," Ashiya said, shaking Lucifer's hand.

"This is going to be interesting." Suzuno said.

* * *

 **Going to have to end it there. R &R.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Next chapter. R &R. And I'm sorry if I didn't say this before, but forgive me if any of the characters seem OOC.**

* * *

"Salutations," Suzuno said as she walked into the apartment. "And Good Hanzo, what did you order now?"

"Actually, the girl in the apartment below us made this." Urushihara said as he put a dragon costume into the closet.

"Oh, I keep forgetting Ms. Okamura is a gifted seamstress." she said.

"Yep, made the costume I needed. And cheap to. Only $20."

"That is not cheap." she said.

"Considering Maou spent $400 on reservations at "Cheezy Chipmunks"." he said. "Yes, that is cheap."

"Very well." she said. "Speaking of the party, did you tell Emi what happened?"

"No," he said. "Shortly after you left and before she came to pick her up. I had to bribe Alas=Ramus with candy to not tell her parents about the party being cancelled."

"Good Hanzo, this is the only time you'll hear me say this. But you screwed yourself by doing that."

"Why and how?" he said.

"Remember the one time you said a bad word in front of her..."

"Don't remind me." he said. "Besides, how was I supposed to know Emi would take that out of context?"

"Take what out of context?" a voice asked.

Turning his head, Urushihara saw a girl with around his age with long black hair and grey eyes standing in the doorway; her black tank top clinging a little too close to her torso and her jeans clinging to her behind as Suzuno hit him in the arm to keep him from staring too long. "H-Hey, Kimmy." he said. "What's up?"

"Nothing much, I just came up here to give your cell phone back. You left it down stairs when you tried on the dragon costume."

"Thanks," he said, taking his phone back from her.

"Oh, and by the way." she said, as she turned to leave. "Your friend Maou called, he said you have a doctor's appointment to go to."

He groaned.

"Don't be a baby about it." she said. "Come on, I'll give you a ride."

Groaning again, he pulled on his shoes and put on the baseball cap that he usually wore outside before he left and locked the door with Suzuno right behind him.

* * *

 **~Later~**

"Okay, Mr. Urushihara. We're almost done." the doctor said as he typed something into his laptop before he put it down on the desk behind him and put his stethoscope in his ears; pressing it against Urushihara's back. "Deep breath."

Obeying the doctor, Urushihara took a deep breath as his phone went off. "Hello?" he asked.

"What the hell were you thinking, leaving the house?!" Ashiya shouted.

Urushihara rolled his eyes. "I had a doctor's appointment." he said as he felt his heart rate speed up. "Why?"

"You took my key!" he shouted.

"No, you left your key at the apartment." Urushihara said before he hissed in pain, making the doctor press the stethoscope to his back again.

"Urushihara, you better not be spending his majesty's money again." he said.

"I'm not. How can I get Maou's wallet when he's working?" he asked before he hissed again in pain. "Look, I gotta go. We'll talk more when I get back." He hung up the phone as the doctor put the stethoscope around his neck again.

"Sounds like your roommates cause you a great deal of stress." he said.

"Just the one really." he said as he winced at the pain.

"Interesting..." the doctor muttered.

"Excuse me?" Urushihara asked.

"Mr. Urushihara, I have diagnosed and treated many irregular heartbeats." the doctor said. "But you're a rare case. You're heartbeat's relatively normal until you're put under a great deal of stress, or you get very angry but can't really express it."

"Please don't tell me you want to run tests." he groaned. "I have to entertain the kids at my niece's birthday party."

"Really?" the doctor asked. "How old is she turning?"

"Three. And we were going to have the party at "Cheezy Chipmunk's Playhouse". But the roommate I just got off the phone with cancelled the reservations. And I'm the one that's going to get in trouble because he's going to blame me."

Really?" he asked. "Well, unfortunately, we are going to run some tests. But I'll wait until after next week." He picked up his perscription pad and scribbled something down. "In the mean time, I'm going to give perscription to help with the way you're body handles stress."

"How so?" he asked.

"It should just keep your heartbeat from going erratic in the case that you're put in a stressful situation." the doctor said. "Just take one pill whenever you wake up in the morning."

"Okay," he said. "Thanks doc."

* * *

 **~Later~**

"So you have to take pills to help deal with the stress?" Kimmy asked as Urushihara looked at something on a shopping website.

"Pretty much." he said. "And even though there are different methods for dealing with stress, I'm too lazy to try them out."

"Yeah, but Urushihara, you already owe Maou twenty bucks for that costume I made for you." she said. "Not to mention all the other things you buy off the internet. Speaking of which, what are you trying to buy now?"

"Decorations for the cake." he said.

"You're honestly going to try and bake a cake, given the fact that you have no baking knowlege?" she asked. "This oughta be entertaining."

"Well, I can't exactly buy the cake. You said it yourself, I already owe Maou a lot of money." he said.

"Or," she said. "I can bake the cake and decorate it seeing as how last time you used the stove, you almost burnt down that wall. And I'll do it for free."

"Really?" he asked. "Thanks."

"It's no problem." she said, seeing his computer screen. "And I can see your niece is a fan of Hamtaro."

"Yeah, it's hard to find a good website with kid cartoons on it that are in Japanese." he said as he clicked the "buy" button, only to be met with a window that alerted him that he couldn't get into Maou's account. "What the..." He hacked into Maou's bank account and saw that it had been frozen until further notice. "Damn it. Maou froze his account."

"That's okay," Kimmy said. "I can make the decorations myself with some modeling chocolate. It's no big deal."

"Thanks Kim," he said. "If I could, I'd kiss you."

"Hara, I have boyfriend back in the U.S." she said.

"A guy can dream, can't he?" he said.

Kimmy sighed and put a hand on his head. "Keep dreaming." she said before she stood up and put her shoes back on. "By the way, did your niece say what flavor cake she wanted?"

"A lot of the kids wanted different flavors actually." he said, turning away from his computer screen. "So I think you might just want to make cupcakes so that everyone's happy."

"Alright," she said. "See ya tomorrow, Hara."

"See ya." he said as she went back downstairs.

Sighing, he closed out of the shopping site and looked up at the night sky; Maou and Ashiya should be home any minute. _God,_ he thought, moving his hair off his face. _I know I don't ask for much, but please, keep Maou from ruining Alas=Ramus' party._

* * *

 **R &R.**


	3. Chapter 3

**R &R**

* * *

 **~1 week later~**

 _I never thought he could do it._ Suzuno thought as she watched Urushihara play with the kids, wearing the dragon costume that Kimmy had made. _But he might just win this bet._ She wiped her forehead with the sleeve on her kimono and looked at the thermometer that was on the wall; reading a temperature of almost ninety degrees. _I hope he doesn't get heat stroke though._

"Uncle Urushihara," Alas=Ramus said as she climbed onto his back with the other kids either hanging off his arms or clinging to his legs trying to "slay the dragon". "Can we have some of the cupcakes that Ms. Kimmy made?"

"Sure thing kid." he said. "Hey who all wants cake?" he asked the other kids.

"I do!" they all shouted.

"Then follow me." he got the kids that were clinging to him off and they all went back inside for some cupcakes and ice cream.

Thankfully for Urushihara, Maou would be out for the entire day with Ashiya because Kimmy took them to the beach. But when her number flashed across the screen to his phone, he got worried.

After making sure the kids used the bathroom so there weren't any accidents, he let them watch a few episodes of "Hamtaro" off his computer as he went into the hallway to take the call. "What?" he asked.

"We got a problem." Kimmy said. "Remember how I told Maou and Ashiya that Chiho would be helping you out?"

"Please don't tell me she showed up." he said.

"She did, I'm trying to keep Maou out of her sight. But honestly though, you might want to end the party early. I can only do so much."

"Mr. Maou!" Chi called.

"We're dead." Kimmy said.

"Calm down." Urushihara said. "The kids' parents are coming to pick them up in half an hour. And they're watching cartoons." He peeked into the apartment and saw that the kids were still sitting there. "They'll be gone by the time you guys get back." He felt a strong impact to his chest and saw that two of the kids (there were ten in total) had tackled him. And Suzuno picked up his phone.

"He'll have to call you back." she said as more kids started to play with him like they did earlier.

"Excuse me," a woman said. She had brown hair that ended at her shoulders and wrinkles around her eyes; her clothes rather professional. "Can you please keep it down. Unlike you I have a life."

"Yeah, I'll keep that the next time I decide to cut work so I can f-"

"Urushihara, how about you and kids go play outside." Suzuno said, knowing Urushihara would swear if she didn't intervine.

Going outside, Urushihara let the kids play and tackle him the way they did earlier until their parents arrived to take them home. "Have a nice evening." he said as the last child left and Alas=Ramus yawned. "Getting tired kid?"

"Mmhmm," she nodded.

"Alright," he said, picking her up. "Come up here, big girl. It's nap time." He loaded her onto his back and gave her a piggyback ride upstairs and tucked her into Maou's bed before he got changed back into his original clothes and sat down at the table; his breaths rapid.

"Are you okay?" Suzuno asked.

"No," he panted. "My head hurts...I feel really hot...and I feel like...I'm going to throw up."

"That's what you get for running around outside in a dragon costume in ninety degree heat." she said as she got a bottle of water out of the fridge and got some pills. "And you forgot to take your perscription this morning."

"Don't...remind me." he said as she walked over and gave him the pills. "Thanks." He popped the pills into his mouth and drank half the bottle of water she had given him in less than three gulps as Maou, Ashiya, Emi, Chiho and Kimmy came in.

"You," Maou said, pointing at Urushihara. "Hallway, right now."

"Sorry Hara, I tried to stall him." Kimmy said as Emi checked on Alas=Ramus.

Once he got into the hallway, Maou slammed the door behind him. "What the hell were you thinking, canceling the reservations?" he growled.

 _I knew Ashiya would blame me._ Urushihara thought before he sighed. "Maou," he said. "As much as I would say it was me, because that would be something I'd do; I didn't do this. You can even ask Suzuno, she'd tell you that Ashiya cancelled the reservations because you didn't tell him."

"Don't lie!" Maou shouted.

"I'm not lying." he said. "Ashiya was the one that cancelled the reservations. And keep your voice down, Alas=Ramus is sleeping."

"Lucifer," Maou said. "Out of all the stunts you have pulled during your stay here, this was the most inconsiderate. Thanks to you, I spent $400 dollars on the party, that never happened! And do you realize how bad that is, considering that the land lady raised our rent? And now, you're blaming it all on Ashiya when he had nothing to do with it."

"Daddy," Alas=Ramus said, rubbing sleep from her eyes. "What's going on?"

"It's nothing, honey." Maou said. "But you might want to say good bye to your uncle, because he's leaving. Tonight."

Urushihara went quiet and bit his lip, trying not to swear in front of her like he did once before. "Alas, sweetie." he said, his body shaking in anger. "Go watch cartoons."

"Okay," she said, going back to the computer as he followed her in and grabbed his coat, pulling on his shoes before he shoved Maou into the hallway and slammed the door behind him.

"Oh, so now you're getting an attitude." Maou said.

"Yeah, because I am sick and tired of not getting any respect. And the one time, the one fucking time I don't cause financial problems; the one time that I actually help you out, by keeping Alas=Ramus happy. I still get yelled at because apparently, I can't be trusted. But here's a newflash for you Satan, you had the chance back in Ente Isla, when you still had power, to kill me. But instead you kept me around."

"That's because I thought you would be useful." Maou said.

"Well, I guess you were wrong then." Urushihara said as he felt pain blossom through his chest. "And congratulations, you got your wish. I'm out of here." He turned and walked down the steps, pulling his coat on as he spread his wings and flew off.

* * *

 **~Later~**

 _Damn Maou,_ Urushihara thought as he walked down the street, having used up all his energy flying away from the apartment. _I tell him the truth, and I'm still the one getting in trouble._ He growled and picked up a rock that was by his feet, throwing it at a car and watching as it hit off the hood and bounced into the street as his phone went off.

"What?!" he growled.

"Sounds like your still a little miffed." Kimmy said. "Calm down before your heart goes erratic."

Taking a deep breath, Urushihara put his forehead in his hand, he could actually feel his heart beating in his ears, and it wasn't going back to normal.

"Where are you?" Kimmy asked.

"Fifth street and Sixth Avenue." he said. "Why?"

"Because "Cheezy Chipmunk's Playhouse" is in that general area." she said. "And according to the news, they found a prostitution ring, a drug ring, and over ten dead bodies in the basement."

"What?!" he asked, flying into the air and searching for police lights, seeing them right where Kimmy said they were. "Woah, maybe it's a good thing that Ashiya cancelled that party." he said. "Who knows what else I could have been blamed for?"

"Hara," she snapped. "Rude."

"I know, I know." he said before he gasped in pain and dropped his phone, both his hands clutching his heart as he fell straight down and broke his arm in two places.

"Hara?" Kimmy asked, hearing his pained gasped over the phone. "Hara!"

* * *

 **Going to have to end it here. R &R. And I'm sorry, but I had to add the bit of drama to it.**


	4. Chapter 4

**Next chapter. R &R.**

* * *

"Hara?" Kimmy asked. "Hara, are you still there? Hara!" Trying not to panic, she hung up and tried to call him again, going straight to voice mail. "Damn," she hissed, hanging up on him and dialing a different number into her phone. "Hi, my name is Kimmy Okamura. I need an ambulance at Fifth Street and Sixth Avenue; my friend is unconscious and may be having a heart attack."

* * *

 **~Meanwhile~**

 _Some day this turned out to be._ Urushihara thought as he clutched his chest in pain, his body shaking. _Everything would have been great if Chiho did show up at the beach. I swear, she has to be more of a stalker than Emi._ Gasping again at the pain, he tried to reach for his phone as an ambulance drove past him.

"Damn," he hissed. Forcing himself to sit up, he tucked his wings away so they weren't using up anymore of his energy before he tried to reach for his phone again, accidentally putting his full weight on his broken arm and crying out at the pain as he face planted onto the concrete again and passed out.

* * *

 **~Meanwhile at the Villa Rosa~**

"Good Sadao, I do believe that throwing Good Hanzo out like that was a bit harsh." Suzuno said as Maou cleaned up the balloons from the party. "He kept Alas=Ramus happy."

"I don't care." he said.

"Sadao!" Suzuno said.

"Name one time besides today, that he actually helped us Suzuno." Maou said as he grabbed another balloon and popped it. "Name one time, he didn't waste our money."

"How about you try and find a time where you listened to reason instead of your servants." Suzuno snapped. "Because I know that Good Hanzo can be irresponsible at times. But when even I can vouch for what he was and wasn't doing, and you still yell at him. You end up lying through your teeth."

"What are you talking about?" Maou asked.

"I'm talking about the fact that you come across as level-headed and insightful. And how half the time you listen to reason instead of just listening to Good Shiro. But then you pull a stunt like that, you throw Lucifer out without batting eye to what Good Shiro tells you. It's stunts like that, that tell me that you don't care for him." she yelled as she backed him into the phone and his phone went off.

"Not a good time, Chi." he said. "Wait, he's what? When did this happen? Uh-huh...Okay, thanks."

"What did she want?" Ashiya asked.

"That was Kimmy, Urushihara's in the hospital." he said as he put his phone back in his pocket.

"What?" Emi asked. "Is he okay?"

"I don't know, they just got there." he said as he pulled on his shoes. "I'm going to go meet them there."

"Daddy, wait. I wanna go with you." Alas=Ramus said, running after Maou.

* * *

 **Sorry I had to make this so short. R &R.**


	5. Chapter 5

**Next chapter. R &R**

* * *

Urushihara woke up slowly, hearing the steady beeping of his heart monitor as he coughed and sat up, pain ripping through his chest the same way it did when Emi had killed him in Ente Isla. Wincing, he gripped at his chest where his heart was and laid back down; his heart monitor going berserk.

 _"Lucifer,"_ a voice called. _"Lucifer, it's okay. Take a deep breath."_

Obeying, Urushihara took a deep breath and tried to control his heart rate; taking breath after breath until his heart had slowed down to the way it was before.

"Don't sit up so fast." the voice said, a little more clearer now. "You're very weak at the moment."

Feeling whoever was next to him put a hand on his forehead, then cup his right cheek as he turned his head and saw a man with the same long purple hair as him and red eyes staring down at him; a pair of black wings sticking out of his back. A man he had thought to be dead. "D-Dad...?"

* * *

 **Sorry I had to make that so short and end that with another cliffhanger. But still R &R.**


End file.
